Kids aren't always cute and cuddly. Sometimes, they have a mean streak that runs a mile long and can appear for seemingly no reason at all. The following people thought back to their childhood and recalled the most unnecessary, meanest thing they ever did.
It’s All Fun And Games Until…
“When I was little, for whatever reason, I was fixated on how hilarious sneezing was. Remember that part in Beauty and the Beast where Belle’s dad sneezes in his dusty workshop? I would rewind that and watch it over and over and laugh and laugh.
Fast forward to kindergarten: somehow I find out that a girl in the first grade has a terrible pollen allergy. I pick a handful of dandelions and chase her, smashing them into her face whenever I get close enough.
The plan works! She’s sneezing like crazy! This is the pinnacle of humor!
But wait: she’s sneezing, but she’s also crying. And wheezing. And her face is swollen and red.
This was the first time my little-kid brain grasped the idea that other people might feel differently about things than you do.” (Source)
Quite The Imagination
“I was six and told my three year old brother that the people in the television had actually been sucked in there by getting too close to the screen. It took my parents months to find out why he would slowly edge around the living room and then burst into tears when they turned the TV on.” (Source)
The Toilet Witch
“My big brother told me about the toilet witch. While you were sitting to pee, she’d stick her hand out of the toilet, and up your butt, and pull you into h–l by your intestines.
I took to peeing behind my dresser. My parents blamed it on the cat. I never set them straight.” (Source)
Don’t Cross This Kid
“When I was really young I got really mad at my dad for some reason. I was so mad that I wanted to kill him so I put those silica packets that you get in shoe boxes in his bottle of Coke. I think I only put a couple of packets in there but he drank some of it. He said it tasted funny so he threw it out. So ya, I tried to kill my dad for some childish reason.” (Source)
Aww, They Love Each Other
“I tried to smother my infant sister when I was three. I don’t remember doing so, but apparently I even had the forethought to ask my grandma sweetly for a glass of apple juice before putting a pillow over her baby seat and sitting on it.” (Source)
That’s Real Cold
“When I was about 6 or 7 and my little brother was about 4 or 5 we were jumping on the trampoline in my Aunt’s backyard one day. My little brother got his foot caught in the springs lining the edge of the thing somehow, and fell over the side. So, he was kind of dangling there, with his foot at an extremely uncomfortable looking angle, screaming.
I got off of the trampoline, went over and looked at him, and then just walked away, back to our house, with no intention of getting help.
Fortunately, he only hung there for a few minutes before his screaming woke my aunt up from her nap and she rescued him. He had a sprained ankle.
I have no idea why I did that. I only have a vague recollection of it. My brother, on the other hand has a cinematic memory of the incident. He loves to tell the story when he meets my friends.
I feel horrible about it and I’ll never be able to explain why I did it… but my brother and I are really close now! He’s my best friend!
tl;dr; Left my brother hanging from a trampoline in terrible pain when we were little. We good now.” (Source)
Gift For The Bus Driver
“In kindergarten, I scooped up a dead bird in an art project (big sheet of paper) and rode the bus home. Threw it on the bus driver’s lap as I exited and sprinted to my front door.” (Source)
Misplaced Aggression
“A kid punched me in the face. I found his little sister and hit her. I have no idea why I thought that would work. I didn’t learn either. He confronted me and pushed me. I stole his sister’s doll and set it on fire.” (Source)
You’re An Army Man, Now
“When I was 10 years old my cousin (also 10) and I convinced my 6 year old brother that he’d been drafted by the army. We even wrote up an official-looking letter and printed it out on my dad’s dot matrix printer.
Then we made him run around the neighborhood to get ready for boot camp.
We thought it was the funniest thing ever. My parents disagreed.” (Source)
That Escalated Quickly
“In sixth grade PE, I always lugged a big water bottle around and people would always ask me for a sip. I had enough of this so I started bringing an extra water bottle that had clear, tasteless laxative dissolved into it and letting people who asked drink laxatives.” (Source)
Chomp, Chomp!
“Between the ages of about 4-7, I would habitually bite other kids. Hard. It got to the point where we had to change daycares several times and my mother broke down in tears. I remember one day my dad bought me a new Hot Wheels car because I hadn’t bitten anyone that day. Nothing like says positive reinforcement like giving your kid a toy for managing to go a whole day without chomping down on someones shoulder.
I’m not really sure why I ever had an affinity for biting people, besides perhaps that I’m actually a cannibal. To this day I like to playfully bite my girlfriend and I don’t want to say its pleasurable, but I do enjoy it somewhat.” (Source)
No Ham For You
“When I was 5, I was at the grocery store with my mom and I managed to lose her; while I was lost and wandering I found some canned ham. I stole every key that was on them and put them in my hoodie pocket. Got home and was like, ‘Look mom!’ Emptied about 200 canned ham keys out of my pocket. Needless to say, a lot of people struggled to open their ham for a couple weeks!” (Source)
“Special Juice”
“Me and a couple of neighbor kids peed in a cup, mixed some watercolor, took it to this one kid and told him it was a special juice. He drank it all up.” (Source)
Prank Gone Wrong
“When I was in 2nd grade, I snuck into the girl’s restroom with a big bucket of dirty, muddy water.
I threw it right over the stall on whatever poor soul was in there at the time, and darted out. Turns out I drenched this one girl that happened to be a good friend of mine, and I mean that she was that one girl that everybody ostracized, and I was that one kid that gave her confidence in herself.
She came out the bathroom crying her eyes out, waddling, asking someone to call her mom.
Her mom had to bring her an entirely new outfit, and even underwear. The principal even made an announcement that whoever did that to her should feel horrible, and you’d better believe I did. No cameras, I got away with it, but the guilt stuck with me so long. It wasn’t even easy to type this.” (Source)
Gumby, No!
“Friend won a ‘Gumby’ keychain at a school carnival. Loved it! As a matter of fact, it was all he talked about for a week. So naturally I decided to ‘kidnap’ it. I sent several ransom letters, never to hear back from him. Finally, I just sliced the b—–d up and mailed it back to him.
HE…WAS…CRUSHED. And I’m pretty sure this was in like the seventh grade…” (Source)
Straight Out Of A Soap Opera
“12-year-old me was an accomplice to my friend picking random numbers out of the phone book and when a woman answered, she very convincingly told them she was having an affair with her husband and said she was pregnant. She said one lady cried and I said we have to call her back and tell her that it’s a prank, but we couldn’t remember which number it was. I still think about that and feel absolutely horrible about it.” (Source)
She Had It Coming
“For reasons unknown, I remember being maybe 4 or 5 years old and coming up behind my sister (6 or 7) who was playing in a sand box. Unprovoked I hit her in the head with a steel pipe and sent her to the hospital.” (Source)
A Most Enjoyable Game
“When I was a kid I used to play ‘The Bee game.’ The Bee game consisted of getting a margarine container, capturing a bunch of bees inside with the lid on, shaking it until they were disoriented and then opening the container and flinging it at other children.
Note: When bees are disoriented they will cling onto the first thing they land on.
Then they will sting it.” (Source)
For Science!
“My aunt insists that when I was five years old I told her, proudly, that I was using my cassette recorder to pinch my infant brother and record the different cries he made. Of course my brother doesn’t remember this, but I don’t either. In any case, he said he forgives me because it was for science.” (Source)
Prepare For A Rough Landing
“At my school near the playground, I found some random cinder blocks, so I piled TONS of fallen leaves on them till they were completely covered, in hopes that some kids would run and jump onto the leaves, but hurt themselves on the cinder blocks.” (Source)