Why must finding a new job feel like such an emotional roller coaster?! Luckily there are plenty of others who have gone through the exact same emotions, and they translated those emotions into bizarre and hysterical tweets! Hopefully this helps such a daunting process!
When in doubt, ask yourself WWBD: What Would Beyoncé Do? Would she apply for a job? Nope. She'd just show up one day like "I work here now."
— Jamie Woodham (@jwoodham) December 12, 2014
Me lying on my resume to get a job https://t.co/PQ95vKdUaz
— Hot Gay Thotumn (@IHateMyLaugh) February 23, 2019
ENTRY LEVEL JOB OPENING:
— jordan (@jordan_stratton) July 6, 2015
Hiring recent college grads
REQUIREMENTS:
5 years of experience, 6 Olympic gold medals, and superpowers.
Interviewer 1: Describe yourself in one word
— Niles (@River_Niles) May 16, 2016
Me: Hired
Interviewer 2:[whispers] Holy shit can she do that??
Interviewer: 'So where do you see yourself in 5 years time?'
— cluedont (@cluedont) January 6, 2014
Me: 'My biggest weakness? Probably not listening properly.'
*Job Interview*
— 8bit Rav3n (@sarcastictroler) February 21, 2017
"Tell me about yourself"
*flashback to when I used to pull out USB drive without clicking safely eject*
"I'm risk taker"
interviewer: can you explain this 5 year gap on your resume
— Terry F (@daemonic3) October 7, 2019
me: i was vibing
interviewer: really?
me: ya literally just vibing
interviewer: [under breath] that’s dope as hell
Interviewer: do you have any regrets?
— haunted unicorn (@hauntedunicorn) February 26, 2015
Me: one time I signed a petition on http://t.co/7BRPTkEiSl and now they won't stop emailing me
Interviewer: do you have good organizational skills
— kylo sten (@ksteeno) February 28, 2017
Me: I've consolidated all my apps to a single homescreen
Interviewer: holy shit
INTERVIEWER: any weaknesses?
— Duke Max “Carnival Lawyer” Ash (@mynameisntdave) February 14, 2017
ME: my strength
I: ?
ME: im physically very weak
I: oh. Any strengths?
ME: [i pick up his desk] im a great liar
When "entry level jobs" require 5 years of experience. pic.twitter.com/Tmdqgf43rj
— Jana 'Fully Automated Luxury Communist' Hall (@ugobananas) August 24, 2018
Day 1 of job hunting: CEO of google sounds about right, I won't settle
— Trill Withers (@TylerIAm) January 30, 2017
Day 58 of job hunting: Ima apply to be a shopping cart at Walmart
I hate when the other guy goes for a handshake and I go for an open-mouth kiss and oh great now I probably didn't get this job
— Jeff Wysaski (@pleatedjeans) October 19, 2014
*calls office back after setting up job interview* did you say at noon or on the moon?
— brent (@murrman5) July 15, 2015
[job int]
— David Hughes (@david8hughes) November 15, 2014
"Under skills u put 'not being afraid of pigeons'."
[nervously shifts in chair]
"That's right. Why? Do any pigeons work here?"