And you thought your teachers knew everything...apparently they don't.
*Face Palm
“If we had no gravity on Earth, we would need weights to tie us down” Source
Take That
In 2nd grade we were doing those Brain Storm quizzes in class, when my teach asks the question “Ignoring air resistance, which falls faster: a kilogram of iron, or a kilogram of feathers?”. I answered they fell at the same speed. She looked at me like I was retarded and in a very condescending voice told me “No sweetie, the iron is heavier”. A few minutes later I was quite satisfied when she read off the answer Source
Completely False
I was told you can not get pregnant if you have been raped. she said womens bodies go into shock making it impossible to conceive So having an abortion if you have been raped is not justifiable Source
Common Misconception
I learned that the USA has 52 states. Apparently this is a common misconception in Norway. I have no idea why Source
Try Again
Teacher tried to tell the class that a light year was a measurement of time Source
Cloning At Its Finest
Econ teacher, senior year. “the population of earth is 23 billion people.” and “scientists figured out cloning in the 50’s, and that’s the reason we have twins today.”
I am not making this up Source
Dun, Dun, Dun…
“This will go on your *PERMANENT RECORD” *Source
True Teacher Dedication
My 6th grade science teacher tried to tell us that plant cells are square/rectangle shaped and animal cells are round in shape. No exceptions, that’s just the way it was.
And it seemed to have some logic to it, but I always kinda felt that was weird.
In his defense though, when I was examining some plant samples under a microscope, I noticed some plant cells were round. I of course asked for clarification. He was stumped (obviously the teacher’s guide made this claim and he was just parroting the ‘facts’). But the next day he came in told me he called the local university and asked for clarification. Apparently we were using some dated texts and the whole idea that the shape of a cell can determine if it’s plant or animal is a bit wrong.
So, while I was told something was untrue, through observation and teacher dedication we found the truth.
One of my favourite moments in school ’cause I learned something, I wasn’t just taught something Source
A Country Difference
10th grade Geography teacher didnt know that Connecticut and Rhode Island were different states. This was in Mississippi.
Same year, English teacher taught us the difference between “y’all” and “all y’all”. Apparently the cutoff is 7 people Source
Which Is Denser?
That mahogany is more dense than iron Source
Close?
Acid makes you trip by making your brain bleed. Then the blood drips down into your spinal column and mixes with your spinal fluids which in turn gives you hallucinations .
WtfSource
Ruined Dreams
“You can be anything you want to be.”
HEY, SCREW YOU, MS. ALLEN, I STILL HAVEN’T BECOME AN ANKYLOSAURUS Source
They Never Got Harder
“You’d better shape up now, because things are only going to get harder next year” Source
That’s Witchcraft!
My 8th grade Physical Science teacher told me that resonating a crystal glass with your finger was “Witchcraft” after showing a video on the properties of solids (Bill Nye).
When I brought in a crystal glass to show him, and the classroom that it was indeed possible, he threw me out of class for “fooling my peers”.
When I went to collect the glass at the end of the class, he swung his giant beer gut around and knocked it over, shattering it and said “Whelp, at least you won’t be tricking anyone again today!”
I took the remnants of the broken glass, put them in a box, went home, talked to my mother, and he was fired by the end of the week.
Apparently he was rubbing everybody the wrong way and they were just looking for that last proverbial straw. My “witchcraft” and “deception” lost him his job.
And he called himself a scientist. Malarkey Source
Not The Brightest Crayon
That the power coming out of a house socket is DC. Grade 10 science teacher. Guy was a moron. He used to call all the students chief. Seriously. Hey chief, whats the answer. Hey chief stop doing that. Hey Chief!
Oh and you know those static balls, where you touch it and your hair stands up? Well he had one of those running, and he warned us, whatever you do, don’t touch a ground when touching the ball (excellent advise). So what does he do? He touches a water tap.
ZAP
He’s all shaken up from the shock, we’re laughing at him. He regains himself and says thats why you don’t do that. He keeps going on with the lesson. While he’s talking, his hand ends up on the tap again. While still touching the static ball.
ZAP #2
So yeah not terribly bright Source
Sounding Fishy
A history teacher told us that the word “picnic” came from “pick a n—-“. Apparently this etymology is thrown around on the internet. I thought it sounded fishy (I was pretty sure it came from a French word) but didn’t say anything at the time because I wasn’t sure. That night I went home and looked it up in a dictionary then online in a few places until I was basically positive.
The next day I raised my hand and said that I had looked it up and explained why I was pretty sure it was wrong. The teacher did not argue with me and basically responded she was sorry she gave us incorrect information, it just goes to show you you can’t trust everything you hear, even if it is from an authority figure. I thought that was an excellent way to handle that, even if she was credulous enough to believe it in the first place Source
Really…?
That there were no people indigenous to Mexico. I was like, “What about the natives?” And she said there were no natives. I was ten.
I rarely hold so much animosity for teachers, but she was a dumb bitch Source
What……
I once had a teacher tell the class that Mother Teresa was at constant risk for getting Aids because she was touching all the poor black people in Africa. I explained to her that it can only be transmitted via blood/bodily fluids and she had pretty much no risk unless she was rubbing blood into her cuts. The teacher made me apologize to the class for correcting her.
I told my folks, who got the principal involved, she ended up just about getting fired and then she had to apologize to me in front of the class. She hated me for the rest of the semester, but it was most definitely worth itSource
Boy Were They Wrong
A math teacher told me (1981) : “Those personal computers are just a fad, don’t take computer science. Take calculus instead” Source
Excuse Me
I’d asked “Why don’t we study lesser known books? The past 3 years have just been the same authors over and over again.”
She told me: “Because they aren’t good.” I said: “Pardon me?” She replied with a smirk: “Well, they aren’t famous. That must mean they aren’t good.”
*This was an AP Literature teacher telling me this Source
Thanks For That
In my 10th grade AP European History class my teacher asked “does anyone know what a ‘deist’ is?” to which I replied “it’s someone who believes that a god created the universe and then stepped back to let events unfold.”
“WRONG! It’s someone who believes that God is like a watchmaker who winds the watch and then doesn’t mess with it.”
Thanks for that, Mrs. C Source
Proven Wrong
That you can never start a sentence with the word “And”
To which I replied: ” And is a word that can never be used to start a sentence” and got thrown out of class for being insolent Source
Dark Suckers
In high school, my chemistry teacher taught that light was the absence of dark and lightbulbs were actually “dark suckers”. He had all kinds of “facts” that supported this. He taught about it for days until someone said that wasn’t right. We argued with him until one of us came up with a flaw in his dark suckers theory.
Turns out, he was using it as a way to teach us about skepticism and he said we shouldn’t trust what he says just because he is our teacher. From then on, if he said something that seemed weird, someone in the class would scream, “prove it!” and he would have to do a demonstration (if he had the equipment) before moving on Source
Not Quite
“Buzz Aldrin was the first man on the moon.” – 7th grade Science teacher swore by it Source
Look Again
Mexico is NOT part of North America… – My World History Teacher Source
*Double Face Palm
My Biology teacher was covering a physics topic once and we were talking about gravity and space travel. Not only did she tell me that the gravity of Mars was 3 times stronger than Earth, but that astronauts has a button that they pressed in their ship to “activate artificial gravity”.
I just put my hand on my face and lamented for the students who would take her seriously one day Source