Desperate Times Call For Outrageous Revenge
What do you do when your bosses are clearly out to get you? Well, if you’re our poor, beleaguered chef Wilson, then you devise a cunning and foolproof way to get the most satisfying revenge humanly possible! His terrible bosses didn’t count on one extremely blatant fact: Wilson’s ability to speak another language. That was the start of what became an epic takedown of a truly nasty restaurant!
Wilson vividly recalls how, “This one is my favorite, of all the multi-lingual escapades I’ve had.” years ago, he was running this kitchen for this family-owned Lebanese-American diner. It wasn’t much, but he really needed a job, and this was the first place that responded to him. He was a decent enough cook, enough to keep this place from totally going under. Often times, it was literally just Wilson in the kitchen. He rarely had any company back there, so it got very lonely quite often. The owners of this place didn’t think very highly of Wilson, thinking he could basically work as their underpaid servant. They would talk badly about poor Wilson all the time in Arabic. What they conveniently forgot was that Wilson was proficient in Arabic, and he had even listed that on his resume! That was only the tip of the iceberg when it came to their petty behavior.
The Evidence Was Horrifying
Wilson did the only natural thing he could think of with such annoying supervisors. He recorded every conversation he had with them. Turns out, his managers spent a lot of time trying to blame Wilson for major health-code violations that they completely ignored! Seriously, the owners wanted to talk badly about Wilson and make him cover up for their mistakes. You can’t have it both ways!
Wilson realized there was no way he could function in this sad, sad job. He wanted to do literally anything else, so he began sending out that resume once again. Hopefully this time the interviewers would actually take not of how he spoke Arabic? Wilson continued to document everything wrong with these messed up diner owners. He had never been this organized in his entire life. But when it came to revenge, Wilson wanted to make everything perfect. He gathered photos, timestamps, and logged so many things. At first, he didn’t know how necessary these materials would be. But once his bosses committed a horrendous offense, he knew how vital this evidence truly was.
Who knows why Wilson’s bosses decided to perform their most offensive action yet, but they did! They stole his payment. At that moment, Wilson knew that, “Everything I had been gathering as my ‘just in case’ plan became the weapon I needed it to be.”
Wilson confronted these human dumpsters about their blatant wage-theft, but they denied every bit of it. Wilson had taken not of major discrepancies when if came to his hours worked, the set wages, and the disconcerting amount the owners “withheld in taxes”. Spoiler alert, several of Wilson’s paychecks did not need to be withheld in taxes. Luckily, Wilson got a shred of positive news after a literal turd storm that day. One of the other restaurants he applied to called him to ask if he was still interested in the position. Of course, he was! Wilson told them that he could start in about three days. That was all the time he needed to completely annihilate this nasty excuse for a diner. The next day, Wilson walked into that diner like the super sleuth he really was. He had a truly massive file. That wasn’t for effect, there really was just that much evidence against his horrible bosses. He told them, “You’ve been stealing from me. I have all proof of all of this, and everything is ready to go to the Health Department, Labor Department, and the IRS. Pay me what you owe, and this doesn’t see the light of day.”
Would they do it? Would Wilson’s pathetic bosses display a shred of decency and realize how they had been stepping all over this poor guy? Would they actually pay him what he rightfully deserved after such a convincing threat?
There Can Only Be One Winner
Surprisingly, Wilson’s two bosses came to their senses! Maybe it was the very tangible threat of all those scary acronyms and being shut down that finally got through their thick skulls. They were quick to pay Wilson in cash, in the exact amount that Wilson recorded was missing from his “paychecks”. Wilson left the evidence on their desk, which they promptly fed into their document shredder. Wilson also knew the perfect exit line. These bosses thought that everything would be fine once again, that they could keep treating Wilson like garbage if they just paid him enough cash, right? WRONG! Wilson was done with their nonsense. He turned back around before he left, and he told his bosses (in Arabic), ‘I could understand you the whole time, you immature morons!”
Wilson considered that his official resignation. He literally didn’t look back on that stupid diner as he walked over to his car. Those owners were dumber than he realized! Of course, he didn’t just keep one copy of the evidence, he kept TWO COPIES! He sent the remaining copy over to the big scary departments. Within the month, this Lebanese-American diner had been permanently shut down. Wilson did not miss it in the slightest.
Never Underestimate A Cook
Wilson had no intention of keeping all of that evidence hidden! After cleaning that hot mess of a kitchen for the umpteenth time, Wilson had quickly devised a plan that he knew the owners would be too stupid to figure out. Seriously, if they forgot his special skill for speaking Arabic, despite seeing it on his resume, then they clearly weren’t paying much attention to anything. Seriously, never underestimate the kitchen employees. If you cross their path, they’ll make sure you get exactly what you deserve. They have the power to make your food truly nightmarish, so wouldn’t you want them to be happy?
Wilson loved his new job so much more. It was remarkable when you were paid fairly based on your output, and your supervisor gave you a healthy amount of responsibility to share with other coworkers. The fact that Wilson’s new boss didn’t talk about him like he was a miserable troll? Astonishing! Who knows what happened to Wilson’s old seedy bosses. Maybe they’ve learned from their ways and want to support the people they do business with? Nah, they’re probably trying to con another poor innocent cook!