Lawyers who work in personal injury or civil law are responsible for helping their clients get compensated for injustices against them.
But sometimes those injustices are quite the stretch. Here are some of truly cringe-worthy stories about people who thought they could get a big payday, but didn't realize how flimsy and ridiculous their case really was!
(Content has been edited for clarity)
Everyone Had To Pick A Side
“I got some work experience at a law firm and a case popped up about a couple who were walking on top of a wall and fell off.
They wanted to the sue the person who owned the wall.”
How Can I Convey What A Jerk You Are?
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“I am a lawyer who specializes in conveyancing in England. For those who don’t know, conveyancing is the legal transferring of property from one owner to another. It’s a requirement if you have a mortgage, but everyone uses conveyancing regardless.
I had a client who was selling. We got all the way to the exchange when we were told there was a tenant living on the property, who we had never ever been told about. We had to delay the sale on the property because the buyers had no idea either, and we were obligated to tell them. The seller got angry at us and refused to give us ANY information after that, saying we should just get on with it.
We explained we needed the info. She refused. She changed from our company to another, and sued us for the delay and because she had to keep paying the mortgage rather than sell the property. She told the ombudsman that we were refusing to progress the matter, and that she was 100% helpful and gave us everything we requested within seconds.
We explained our side with evidence of consistent letter writing, etc. and got told that it was our fault because we didn’t request information about the tenant daily (we did it 2-3 times a week but not daily, and she had changed to another company within two weeks) and because we didn’t specifically ask her about the tenant BEFORE she had instructed us to even act.
It was baffling. We ended up paying her fees back plus 300%. She gave us negative reviews, saying the next company sold the house within four days. We looked it up, and she still owns the property…
People are jerks.”
Can You Sue An Entire Continent?
“I work for a judge and we get some absolutely ridiculous cases. The most ridiculous was this guy who alleged there was an international UN-based plot against ‘rednecks’ (that was the word that he used) in America, and how they had some super-secret high tech army to eliminate rednecks. He was in prison and was requesting a presidential pardon, a boatload of money, a church and tax-free status, recognition as a sovereign nation, etc. He was suing the government, and the continent of Asia (yeah, the whole continent) and the United Nations, etc. He also said that he had sent letters to Britney Spears and she had never answered, which somehow meant there was a big conspiracy against rednecks.
All of this was in a 30-page document, completely illegible in his terrible handwriting.”
The Cost Of Being A Hero
“I was out at a restaurant with some of my friends. There was a guy sitting behind us who went into cardiac arrest. I was a trainee paramedic at the time; I decided to give him CPR. I kept his heart pumping for three minutes before the ambulance arrived. He lived. Three weeks later, I received a lawsuit complaining that I had broken one of the man’s ribs.
I saved his life, and he was suing me because of a minor injury that is considered sometimes necessary in order to perform CPR.”
I’m Glad Your Lawyer Had Fun
“I got sued once for hitting a guy in my Ramcharger. It was my fault, but he tried to play me and lost horribly. He got into the ambulance at the scene, then decided against it and said he was fine. The same cop gave us both a ride home. He proceeded to go to a bar, got sloshed, and fell off a barstool and hurt his back. NOW he was hurt enough to go to a hospital.
He sued but neglected to mention the part about falling off the barstool to anyone. My lawyer ripped him apart in court and I never had to pay a dime other than what insurance paid for his car. Afterwards, my lawyer told me that was the most fun he’s ever had working on a case.
I have another one, too. Someone is currently suing a family member because SHE veered into the left-hand lane while making a right-hand turn, causing this family member to sideswipe them.
No idea how that one is going to turn out, but I can’t wait to find out.
I have yet another one, too. I almost got scammed 12 years ago. It was the maddest I’ve ever seen a cop. I rear-ended a lady in a Toyota 4×4 doing about 10 mph. We were pulling off at a stoplight and she hit her brakes. Her brake lights weren’t as bright as the setting sun in my eyes, and I hit her. The only part of my truck to impact her vehicle was a tow hook about 3 inches long and an inch wide. The entire left side of her back bumper was pushed in, a taillight was broken, and there was minor body damage all over the car.
I don’t have pictures, but it was very clear that there was no way my impact could have caused all that. She claimed otherwise, and very loudly to the officer that reported to the scene. He was furious. He told me that I was free to go and I wasted no time doing so. As I pulled off, he was giving her the drill instructor treatment.”
A Delayed Reaction
“Two years ago, I was struck head-on at an intersection by a woman driving an SUV (I was driving my dad’s Civic). She was speeding and had gone through a red light. My car was totaled, while hers looked like her bumper needed to be replaced. When the police showed up, they told me that she was obviously at fault and not to worry. A few days later, I got a call from my insurance company saying that I was at fault. It turns out the lady that hit me was the police chief’s wife. It took a year to fight the case in court, which I eventually won due to the huge amounts of evidence against her. But it gets better.
Two months ago, I got a call from my insurance company saying that they were going to close the case. It was a huge relief to hear that that chapter of my life was over. The NEXT day, I got a call saying that the case was reopened and I was being sued because the lady had suffered injuries in the crash…a crash that I was ultimately found not at fault for. Two years after the fact, she is suing me for her hospital bills and ‘injuries.'”
She’s The One Who Should Be Sued
“My lawyer husband had a woman come into his office with this gem: she wanted to sue a large grocery chain because her baby’s fingers had gotten hurt in one of their carts. How so? Well, all she did was put her baby in the cart.
You know, down underneath the cart, on that shelf where the babies go? The baby’s fingers were dangling down to the floor, and the mom ran over them. My husband asked her to see herself out.”
The Upside Down Cheeseburger
“My dad is a lawyer, and he had one person come in that wanted to sue McDonald’s because she got her cheeseburger upside down in the bag instead of right side up.”
Her Balcony Fall Opened Her Up To All Sorts Of Scrutiny
“Around seven or eight years ago, a woman fell, together with her crumbling balcony, onto my mother’s car. This woman was around 55 years old, so she ended up with lots of broken bones and some pretty nasty bruises. Considering that my mom’s car pretty much saved this woman’s life (she would have fallen from a greater height and onto rough concrete had it not been there), she decided it was a good idea to sue us. It’s important to note here that:
a) It was her fault that she fell, as she decided that wasting her money on safety checks was of no use. Therefore, she was getting no insurance money.
b) Our car insurance sued her for some of the damage she had caused (we paid most of it).
Ms. Thick-as-a-Brick decided to sue my mother for parking her car there. She claimed that she would have been better off if it weren’t there (which by any logic was complete bull). Well, guess what happened – she lost the case. As a result, she now had to pay both for the damage she caused, a fraction of her medical bill (she had medical insurance), and the lawyer fees for both herself and my mother.
This is the point where she exhibits excellent cognitive skills and logic: she decided to move without informing the authorities. My mom noticed the moving-crew and decided to follow her to her new address. She wrote down the address and eventually provided our insurance with it since the woman had stopped responding to her mail. All of this got her in more trouble than she already was.
To top it all off, the investigation caused by the latter eventually led to the police finding out that she and her husband were connected to a human trafficking network.”
So That’s Why Lighters Have A Safety Label
“I’m not a lawyer, but in my law class, the teacher told us a bunch of awesome stories.
One case he worked on involved a mom who was getting high with her 3-year-old son around. She ended up doing too much and passed out, dropping her lighter on a coffee table. The little boy came around and saw the lighter, and picked it up. He wondered if it would glow if he held it under his shirt and lit it. He was horribly burned.
So once his hyped-up mom regained consciousness, she decided to sue the lighter company because it was totally their fault for not putting a ‘keep out of reach of children’ sticker on it. She actually won an insane amount of money (which I imagine went straight to more of the hard stuff since she could now afford it, and screw spending any to help her son in any way). Now, lighters have a ‘keep out of reach of children’ sticker on them.”
They Rigged A Trap Worthy Of Home Alone, But It Cost Them Dearly
“Law student here. One of the best cases we’ve studied so far: Katko v. Briney, 1971.
An elderly couple, the Brineys, owned a boarded-up old house on some property where they didn’t actually live, and they grew tired of trespassers coming onto the land. Apparently, it happened frequently. Finally, after ‘No Trespassing’ signs failed, Mr. Briney cleaned and oiled a 20-gauge weapon, rigged it to a bed frame in the house aimed at the bedroom door, and ran a wire from the trigger to the doorknob. Problem solved, he figured.
One day, a fellow named Katko decided to break into the house and steal some old bottles and other items he considered to be antiques. He came in by removing some window boards, opened the bedroom door, and – BOOM – the 20-gauge blows his entire right leg clear and away.
Katko survived and sued the Brineys. The case went to the Supreme Court of Iowa and Katko won on the basis that one only gets the privilege to use deadly force if an intruder threatens death or great bodily harm. Since the Brineys were only protecting property and not their lives, they had no privilege for installing a drone cannon in their shed.
In fact, in response to this ruling, several states enacted reactionary ‘Briney Bills’ geared toward protecting those defending their homes, families or property. A Nebraska act passed stating that no person shall be placed in jeopardy for defending by any means those things. Fortunately, that legislation was held to be unconstitutional.
The original case is not so unreasonable – it’s just strange to imagine a criminal who commits an unlawful action then gaining a claim against the person being wronged.”
No Wonder His Kids Were Taken Away
“I used to work for the Attorney General in my home jurisdiction. A guy who’d had his children taken away for some really horrible abuse (he was crazy and had really violent beliefs) tried to get his kids back by claiming they were his intellectual property.
He sent notices that he’d copyrighted the kids, and made demands for their return. Then he got the idea that his name and all his kids’ names were trademarks, so every time he received a court document that referenced any of their names, he sent us an invoice for trillions of dollars for each use of his ‘trademarks.'”
Who Was Your Lawyer, Julius Caesar?
“When I was working for a New Jersey judge, we did mostly cases with the Division of Youth and Family Services (negligent custody, adoptions, etc.). This case technically was the government suing for custody, and it wasn’t stupid. The parents never fed, clothed, sent their children to school, or otherwise let them out of the house, in addition to beating them.
At any rate, this case was recurring and involved parents who claimed to belong to the Moorish Nation. Feel free to look them up on Wikipedia.
Their entire legal defense was that they were descended from Moors, and the United States government had no power over them. Not only was the government powerless over the Moors, but by taking the children, we were also committing mass, world-wide genocide. Additionally, we were committing piracy, abuse, and various other religious transgressions.
What was most surprising to me was that their brief to the court seemed to have been written by someone with at least some legal training. But it only cited Ancient Roman (and other old-world) civil law, multiple treaties between African and European states, a few completely off-point cases from like Wyoming and Ohio traffic court, and a copious amount of ‘religious law’ that I was never able to find at all.
Needless to say, we placed the kids with foster parents – despite a riot breaking out in the courtroom because the entire church showed up. Luckily, the brief and parents’ testimony described in comprehensive, vivid detail how everyone on the prosecution side (including me) was going to burn in the eternal flames of damnation. So I’ve got that to look forward to.”
A Bumpy Ride For Everyone
“I worked in a forensic engineering company for a little while. I saw a case where a skateboarder was hitching (holding onto the back of a truck without their consent) and hit a bump in the road. He somehow fell down and the truck ran over him. He had terrible injuries and was paralyzed from the waist down. Reading the depositions and seeing the pictures was incredibly sad and gruesome.
Anyways, long story short, the skateboarder sues the city for a ton of money and wins. Supposedly there was a manhole protruding farther than it should have been and was not up to code. I don’t remember the specifics, but it was heavy into the seven figures.”
Haters Gonna Hate!
“My practice does a lot of personal injury work, so I get ridiculous calls every day. Everyone thinks they have a million dollar case and many people call us before they even seek medical attention. The truth is, most injuries aren’t worth pursuing unless they are fairly serious.
People don’t give plaintiffs’ attorneys enough credit. We act as an important shield to keeping ridiculous cases out of the courts (despite what you may hear the news blowing out of proportion). We easily turn down 90% of cases.
Why people hate us is mystifying. We sue insurance companies; everyone hates insurance companies. It is ungodly rare to sue someone without insurance coverage or to seek damages beyond insurance policy limits. Insurance policies even provide free legal defense to defendants. That’s getting off pretty easy after negligently hurting someone else who just wants their medical bills and lost work paid for. Ah well. It’s not like I didn’t know about the hate for lawyers before becoming a lawyer.”
Dude, Just Get Another DVD
“Sitting in small claims court one day, I observed the following pro se bench trial (pro se means they represent themselves, without the use of a lawyer). The plaintiff was suing an adult film store for the cost of one DVD. He alleged the DVD was defective and would not play past a certain point.
The store’s defense was two part:
1. Their no-refunds policy was clearly stated on the receipt, and…
2. The plaintiff was lying, was unable to describe at what scene the DVD stopped working, and refused their offer of an exchange.
The judge looked as though she was going to reach over and strangle the plaintiff at the end. She ruled for the defense. Had the store hired an attorney, I think she would have awarded costs to them too.”
The Urinal Buffer Rule
“A friend of mine had a boss who claimed this story from his days as a public defender. The defendant was allegedly pleasuring himself at a urinal in the bathroom. A plain-clothes undercover cop caught him. They were the only ones in the bathroom. The case went to a jury trial for public indecency or something like that.
Basically, the public defender’s entire defense was the ‘urinal buffer rule.’ As in, if space is available, a man will never willingly choose a urinal directly adjacent to one already in use, he’ll have a one urinal buffer. The guy gets acquitted.”
You Can Talk The Talk, But Can You Walk The Walk?
“My dad is a lawyer and he had a person come in who he couldn’t walk because of some ‘injury’ at work. At the time, my dad was skeptical, so he hired a psychologist to do an examination on him, and she found out that something COULD be wrong, but she couldn’t put her finger on it.
Jump to next week, my dad ended up with a video in his hands of the person WALKING down their driveway to take out the trash. Busted. Now my dad was angry. He knew this guy was a scumbag just trying to get money over nothing, which makes lawyers like him look bad. So my dad called him and said, ‘Hey, come on in, we have a breakthrough in your case, and you can get some money for your injury.’
So the guy came to his office, and my dad left him sitting in the lobby for almost an hour, on purpose. Finally, my dad called him into the meeting room and played the video.
The guy walked out.”