Sometimes, all you can say is "
Jerk
I used to work at a grocery store as a bagger. This guy said he wanted his milk in a bag, and he has a lot of stuff… so when I finally got around to the milk (cause prioritizing and all that jazz), I wanted to confirm that’s what he said. It just slipped my mind. So I asked again… He proceeded to yell, so loud that the next two lanes got quiet and they were all staring at what was going on, “Are you f_cking stupid? You have hearing problems? Where is your manager? They should fire you for being so stupid. I already said I wanted it in the bag.” For f_cks sake, I just want to make people happy. Of course, the assh*le manager was working that day, so he didn’t say a word, even though he watched it go down. I at least had the sympathy of the checkers from the other two lanes. (Source)
Crazy Lady
One time before HDTV and flat TV’s but still since cable ready TV’s, a lady came into Wal-Mart with a huge floor model console TV, the kind that had no remote, and wanted to return it and get her money back. She started yelling at me when I told her I wasn’t accepting the return as she had no receipt and the TV was obviously over 15yrs old, and she demanded to speak with a manager. So I paged a manager who told her basically the same thing, she then started demanding to speak with “Sam”, we were like Sam Who? “Sam Walton – Your Boss!” she screams. My manager had about enough of this lady’s BS and told her, “Well ma’am we have a wide selection of shovel in Lawn & Garden so you can go dig him up!” (Source)
That One Regular
I worked at a fast food place for a while and had this one regular who ALWAYS had something to complain about. The worst was that no matter what, our fries were NEVER fresh. Whenever we saw her we’d drop fresh fries just so she wouldn’t complain about them. She’d order, and we’d give her fries directly from the fryer and she’d tell us they weren’t fresh…What the f*ck? My manager got them from her, walked to the back, and brought her the exact same container and apologized…The lady said “these are perfect” and went about her day. (Source)
Priceless
I was in Target, and a customer turns to me and asks where a particular product is. I reply, and tell her what aisle I think it’s in, and roughly where to find it. I then go back to what I was doing. This lady suddenly gets all huffy, and is like “that wasn’t very helpful, aren’t you supposed to take me to the product or something”!? I’m kind of taken back by her rude response, and just kind of blink at her for a second until I realize what’s happening. And then I look her straight in the eye and say: I don’t work here. The look on her face was priceless. I try not to wear red shirts to shop at Target anymore. (Source)
Stupid As They Come
Guy walks in to Tractor Supply, steals bolt cutters off of the shelf. Then walks to the side door and cuts the lock where two of his buddies have been placing items near the door. They pile everything in this tiny car and just drive off. They were caught later that day for trying to steal from another store in the same plaza. (Source)
A Savage Business Casual Warlord
Watched a man carrying six bottles of red wine simply drop all six bottles on the ground (shattering them) and walk out of the store, khakis stained bright red like a savage business casual warlord. My assumption was that it was an accident and he was horribly embarrassed and just left. I’d like to believe that it was an intentional piece of performance art, because it was the most beautiful thing I have ever witnessed. (Source)
Are You Serious?!
So I used to work in H&M located on 5th ave in NYC, so as you can imagine we would get assh_les from all over the world. One day I hear over our radio a frantic call for the porter to come to the ladies fitting room. Turns out a woman decided to take a sh_t in the fitting room, and use some shirts to wipe herself. The real are you serious moment was that she continued shopping through the store casually. (Source)
Brass Balls
I worked at Sears and watched this guy with big brass balls walk in, wave, pick up a TV and walk back out. Alarm didn’t even go off. (Source)
Ummm?
I hear “excuse me?” and look up from stocking the milk, which I’m standing in front of. “Could you tell me where your milk is?”
I almost didn’t answer her, milk is basically the whole aisle and I had it in my hands. (Source)
“That Guy”
I worked at McDonald’s when I was 16-17. My first day, in the grill area training during lunch rush this guy comes in through drive thru and orders 100 burgers, 50 plain, 50 with cheese. I was like, “wtf man?” I was told it was a lunch truck guy that would order them (at the time we had a 49 cent burger and 59 cent cheeseburger day) then dress them out and sell them for like 2 to 3 bucks a piece to his customers. (Source)
“I Am So, So Sorry”
I work overnight stock at Walmart. One night, I’m over stocking the Spam section, and this big guy walks up. Big big. I’m talking 300-400 pounds big. I continue minding my own business, putting things on the shelves, and he speaks. “Excuse me, sir. I am so, so sorry that you have to see this.” And then he just… pauses. Confused and concerned on equal levels, I stand up and turn around to look at him, wondering what exactly he plans on doing. After staring at me for about a good twenty seconds (no exaggeration) he reaches over and and grabs a ton of Spam. More containers of Spam than I ever thought anybody should ever need in their lifetime, let alone one shopping trip. (That one is an exaggeration, sue me.) With his cart fully loaded with Spam, he turns around and walks away, leaving a huge empty spot on the shelves that I’d been filling up. I manage to get out a quick, “Have a nice day” before he escaped around the corner. It was… certainly an experience. (Source)
Dead Serious
I worked at Walmart. A woman came in to return a bag of soil because “the bag was dirty”. She was dead serious. (Source)
Whyyy
You’d be surprised how many women would rather slip a raw steak into their purses/pants then pay whatever sale price they are going for. And this is in the ‘Upscale’ supermarket as well. (Source)