A Revenge Best Served Festive
Deck the halls with boughs of karma, fa la la la la, la la la la!
There seems to be a bit of magic in the air around the holiday season – all the lights, festive decorations, colorful gifts nestled under the tree, it’s no wonder it is many people’s favorite time of year. And for one woman, whom we’ll call Sally, a very memorable and magic Christmas was had when giving her controlling and incredibly lazy coworker the Christmas surprise she really deserved. Here is how her tale unfolds:
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What Should Have Been An Easy Job
A few years ago, Sally had made the decision to move in with some of her best friends, one of which got her a job at a local gas station. For our protagonist, everything was perfect. She got to live with people she cared about, was so close to her new job that she could walk there, and she was getting paid for what should have been one of the easiest jobs she ever held…that is, before she met Denise.
You see, Sally was working the night shift, which normally was a ghost town when it came to helping customers. The bulk of the work was simple – stocking and cleaning. The main chores included restocking and organizing merchandise, sweeping and mopping, keeping the coffee fresh for that rare late-night customer, taking out the trash, sweep the parking lot, and restocking the beverage cooler from the inside, the latter of which could take upwards of 2 hours in a below 40-degree cooler.
As Sally explained, there was always 2 people on the clock, and it was customary to divvy up the tasks and take turns with less desirable duties, such as bundling up to restock the beverage cooler. Most of Sally’s coworkers were decent human beings that understood the value of trading labor for a paycheck and team work. Denise was not this person.
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“I’m Doing Inventory”
Denise was the literal definition of a waste of space. The cleaning and stocking, or even ringing up the occasional customer, was far beneath her talents it so seemed. Instead, Denise would either spend her time in the manager’s office, despite not being a manager or even a shift lead, or would be up front doing “inventory” on the cartons of smokes, and that’s about it. Let’s be real – we all know smoking is addicting and those customers coming in needed their brand in stock and ready to go. Denise was clearly doing God’s mission and needed to be thorough, so much so that even while she idled near the registers doing her oh-so-important inventory, she still required the other person on shift with her to ring up any customer who entered.
Denise had a power-complex, and despite having any actual authority, she fancied herself second in command at the store under the manager. As Sally explained, while shift leads had a few more responsibilities, such as taking inventory and ordering stock, they really didn’t have any managerial authority. And Denise herself was not an official shift lead, but apparently took it upon herself to perform these additional tasks, thus really let the “power” go to her head. Being lazy is one thing, but as Sally would soon discover, being lazy and abusing the smallest amount of power would prove to be a living nightmare.
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Self-Proclaimed Assistant Manager
Denise was on her campaign to the top, even taking training classes to officially become a shift lead and beyond. As such, most of her already unproductive shift was now spent walking around the store with a clipboard in her hands, scribbling notes of areas of “improvements.” It was clear to Sally that Denise had zero clue what this word meant, as most of her proposed “improvements” made operations even worse than before.
One of her first items was mandating no one spend more than one hour restocking the beverage cooler during their shift to avoid being in the almost freezing conditions for so long. While this alone wasn’t a bad idea, Sally found it quite ironic that as much as she harped on this rule, Denise never once stepped foot inside the cooler herself. Apparently she was above her own self-mandated laws.
The worst “improvement” though was by far the implementation of mandatory weekly meetings. Apparently Denise had read in one of her training books that the meetings were company policy despite no one, including the manager, having any knowledge of this before. As Sally put it, these meetings were “universally hated and totally useless” and we can see why. Really, who wants to come into work on their off day for 20 minutes to listen to an entitled bimbo ramble on and on about things that either everyone knows or no one cares about. Like everything else she did, these meetings were just another way Denise could flex her “power” as she forced her coworkers to listen to all her dumb observations she had scribbled on her clipboard, or so Sally was told. You see, Sally already had a “doctor’s appointment” scheduled the day of the first meeting, when in reality she went to an interview. While Sally didn’t care for Denise at all, she could deal with her bull on the few shifts they had together, but recently Denise had really crossed the line, which put Sally’s job search and subsequent quitting revenge plot into motion.
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Lying Through Her Teeth
After a few months on the job, Sally’s best friend Marge, the great gal that got her the gig in the first place, came to her with some troubling news. The last time she worked with their manager Roy, he started talking mad smack on Sally, saying she was lazy and forced her coworkers to pick up the slack getting all the nightly duties done. Sally was flabbergasted – why in the world would Roy think that? She worked hard during her shifts, and never complained about doing anything asked of her. That’s when Marge dropped the ultimate bomb – Denise was his “trusty” source for this revelation. Sally was TICKED. Who did Denise think she was? Being lazy and playing fake boss was one thing, but spreading awful rumors about her was another. And Roy just bought her at her word, never bothering to get her side of the story or even simply checking the cameras that would quickly dismiss these claims as total bull.
At the moment Sally was done, and began looking for an epic way out.
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Time For Revenge
It didn’t take long for Sally to land a new gig. Once her background check and employment verification were complete and an official offer was on the table, she came into her shift one day and pulled her shift lead Jessica aside, asking the best way to put in her two weeks notice. Jessica cracked a big grin, and asked who she would be working with on her very last shift. Confused, Sally double-checked the schedule and confirmed it was Denise. Of course… On Christmas Day no less! Sally sighed while Jessica’s smile grew even wider.
“Are you sure you really got the job?”
Sally reassured her that indeed, it was all official.
“But are you sure you want to put in your two weeks?”
Sally stared at Jessica, still wearing a stupid big grin, trying to understand. Then it clicked.
“Nope, never mind!”
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Carrying Out The Plan
On her second to last shift, Sally began setting the stage for her revenge plot. Step one – the clipboard. Denise was a bit…vertically challenged compared to most. Perhaps there was a Napoleon Complex at play here too. Anywho, Sally took the clipboard and tossed it on top of a tall filing cabinet in the manager’s office. For Sally and most of her soon to be ex-coworkers, it will still in their field of vision and easy to reach. Unfortunately for Denise, that wouldn’t be the case. Still, Sally figured it still wouldn’t take much time or effort for her to locate. It was also just for a bit of fun, the real revenge plot was what she had in store for tomorrow.
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Merry Christmas Ya Filthy Animals
Finally, the day of justice was here, Sally’s last shift! It was Christmas day, and Sally was scheduled to get in a bit earlier than normal at 7pm. The first part of her shift was a blast, as her bestie Marge was finishing up her shift that ended at 10pm. The pair enjoyed the rare moments of cracking jokes and enjoying as much holiday cheer as one can working at a gas station on Christmas Day, but being one of the few places open around, they were generally pretty swamped.
Once the clock struck 10pm, Marge hugged Sally goodbye, giving her a smile and a wink as she walked out the front door. She knew all too well what was in store next. Denise was scheduled to come in for her normal shift of 10pm-6am, and of course, was running late. Finally, Sally heard door open and watched Denise saunter in with her normal smug look on her face. Finishing up her current transaction, she excused herself from the register and walked straight up to Denise. With a big smile and as much holiday cheer as she could muster, Sally looked Denise straight in the eye and proclaimed “Merry Christmas! I quit!”
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Good Luck!
Without skipping a beat, Sally grabbed her coat and headed for the door. Denise looked like she had just seen a ghost – all the color drained from her cheeks, her pupils dilated, her mouth hung slightly agape. Just as Sally grabbed the door handle Denise was able to sputter out “Are you kidding?”, looking quite desperate now. Sally paused in the entrance, door cracked, threw her head back and let out a jolly chuckle.
“It wouldn’t be a Merry Christmas for me if I were kidding.”
With that, Sally slipped out into the cold, feeling pure holiday bliss.
Back in the store, Denise went into full on panic mode. She ran to the back and grabbed the list of employee phone numbers, desperately dialing every number for someone to come to help. Unfortunately for our dear friend Denise, karma was in full swing. In the past, whenever someone had to call off, it was customary to call around to find someone else to cover. Most people were decent, and if they truly couldn’t cover would let the caller know why, such as they couldn’t find a sitter in time or had plans with family or the like. But not Denise. Anytime she received one of these calls, she would rudely shout “no” and immediately hang up the phone. You might be able to guess where this is going. One by one, each caller repaid the favor. “No,” phone slam. “No,” phone slam. “No,” phone slam.
Out of options, Denise was left to actually have to work for once all alone, on a busy Christmas night nonetheless. It was hours before she was finally able to get a hold of Roy and have him arrive to help relieve her.
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Mischief Managed
But wait, the clipboard! Ah yes, the clipboard.
When the time rolled around for her next team meeting, Denise realized she couldn’t find her clipboard anywhere. She had a full-on meltdown in front of everyone over it, as if it was the clipboard that gave her all the power and authority she craved. Like watching a car wreck, the rest of the employees silently watched, occasionally glancing over to its location on top of the filing cabinet. No one said a word.
Without her important notes, the meeting was sadly canceled, and everyone made their way home. That was last meeting ever scheduled, much to Denise’s dismay.
And so concludes our tale of holiday revenge. It’s a Christmas Sally remembers fondly, because even though she cut her own family festivities short to come in and work a 3-hour shift before quitting in epic fashion, it was far worth it to see the smug look wiped off Denise’s face. Bonus points for dragging Roy into the plot and joy for all for helping to get the weekly team meetings canceled. It’s a day that always bring a smile to Sally’s face, the best gift of all.
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