Everyone parents differently, but not all parenting is correct. These 16 parents had some truly bizarre rules and advice they imposed upon their children.
Two-faced Friends
“Not everyone is nice to people’s faces and then talks absolute sh_t about them behind their back. I’m never sure if people actually like me…my mom would always do this sh_t where after a family gathering she would rag on her sisters and brother to my dad in the car on our way back home. She would just belittle them for their cooking or hosting abilities, then would pat herself at the back for those fruit salads she brought and encourage us (her husband and kids) to praise her too. As I grew up, I realized that sh_t doesn’t fly, so I started to tune out whenever she was talking. The worst part is sometimes I would complain about my close friends to my other friends behind their backs, thinking it was a common behaviour to do. Only realized that I was unconsciously justifying it when my boyfriend pointed it out.” Source
The Ragamuffin Family
“My mother is convinced all clothes are too tight unless they are falling off you. I looked like a ragamuffin for years until my rich sister-in-law pulled me aside and went, ‘sweetie… I’m gonna take you shopping before you ever have to attend any job interviews looking like that.'” Source
The Garbage Disposal
“That the garbage disposal will not trigger a nuclear reaction and blow up half the world within five seconds of being turned on without cold water running. That was a tough one to unlearn.” Source
What’s That Called Again?
“My dad thought it was funny to teach my sister, brother and I the wrong names to things. Sister confuses plates and bowls. Brother confuses forks and spoons. I get confused with Beetroot and capsicum. I get it right most of the time now.”Source
Anger Issues
“That anger doesn’t have to be the default reaction to anything you don’t like. Someone has a different opinion? They’re telling you you’re wrong and stupid and you should be pissed. Someone make an off hand comment that struck you the wrong way? They’re a_sholes! And you should be pissed. Anything, anywhere, at anytime happened that you didn’t like for any reason? Be pissed! No thanks, it makes for a sh_t life.” Source
The Second Middle Name
“My mother told me I had another middle name one day. Aloyisius. I hated it, of course, but eventually came to terms with the idea. It was years later that she realized I had been writing an extra middle name on literally everything that required my full name — and asked me why I was doing such an odd thing. She had forgotten what she had done. When I told her, she laughed at me for about an hour straight. Tears rolling down her face, laughing so hard she peed herself. Yeah, thanks. She also taught me capsicum seeds were poisonous. They aren’t. (She really believes this one though.)” Source
A Mysterious Cause of Death…
“Korean fan death…. For those who don’t know about this, Korean people believe that if you sleep with a fan on with all windows and door closed you will die. Still can’t convince my parents that this is a myth.” Source
A Lesson in Anatomy
“Whenever I had a stomach ache after dinner, my mother used to tell us ‘it hasn’t even reached your stomach yet.’ It took us a few years (teens) to call her out on it when we learned basic anatomy. What did she think happened? A delicious chicken fried steak smothered in country gravy just stayed in your esophagus?” Source
Buying in Bulk
“Quantity over quality. Though my family was economically stable, privileged even, my parents grew up in poverty. So their way of buying was to buy cheap. Which definitely should be taken into consideration, but ultimately, if the quality is not there you end up spending more to continuously replace the item. We could afford to buy things of better quality that would last longer, but that’s just not how they grew up. It still hurts me to spill $60 on a nice pair of shoes that will last more than a year, but I have since learned that I would much rather spend this $60 one time, rather than getting 3 pairs of $20 crappy no-brand shoes that hurt my feet and fall apart every few months.” Source
Standing Up for Others
“To be a bystander, for lack of a better term. My parents are very against me standing up for others and even myself in some cases, and I had to learn that standing up for other people is the right thing to do. Also how to pronounce cucumbers.”Source
Shh! The Cake is in the Oven!
“That loud noises and rough housing cause the cake to not rise when baking in the oven. Come to find out 20 years later it was just a lie to get us to be quiet. Now that I think of it, they got quiet kids AND cake. Scratch that, I’ll remember this instead and use it in the future.” Source
Tough Love
“That you should never do anything for others because nobody will do anything for you. I understand because my mom came from a very rough household growing up, but it was frustrating whenever she found out I bought lunch for my friends or gave someone a ride–she’d always say, ‘nobody will look out for you, why do the same?'” Source
The Obsessive Compulsive Cleaner
“My mom is obsessively clean. It took me a couple years into my marriage to stop cleaning to her standards. I am not a dirty person but I don’t have a fit about a little dust on the baseboards. She should see my carpet right now. I’ve been sewing. There are scraps and threads all over. She’d twitch.” Source
Respect Your Elders
“That just because someone is older than me doesn’t mean they know more than me. Yes it’s true I don’t have as much experience or knowledge about things in the world but it is possible for me to know something that someone who is older than me doesn’t know. My dad always used the ‘I’m older/wiser/more experienced’ line if I said something like a fact or piece of information that he didn’t agree with or think was true. It made me feel a little insecure about what I know and if what I know is right or not.” Source
The Ice Cream Van
“When an ice cream van goes past with the music on, that means he has ran out of ice cream.” Source
Not All Chicken is Dry…
“Cooking chicken…until college, I thought that chicken was supposed to be dry. I hated it. My buddy cooked me chicken parmesan and it was the best chicken I ever had.” Source